The Blog Farm

The Blog Farm

Monday, October 6, 2008

The Mirror


The Mirror

The mirror is

 My enemy
When I look

 Inside I see,
A little girl 

Who is so lost
Tears well up in me.

She looks so frightened,

 So very sad
I can't reach out or touch,
It's just too hard 

To look at her
For the memories

 Are just too much.

I know she needs

 My guidance
But she reminds me

 Of all my fears,
Hate I see within her eyes
She sheds so

 Many tears.

So I walk away

 And leave her
Can't bear to 

See her cry,
I try so hard

 To block it out
There's too many

 Tears to dry.

As I turn and look

 Back in the mirror
My adult self I see,
So many thoughts
 I remember
It just envelops me.


If I could 

Smash the mirror
That little girl

 Would disappear,
But then she would 
Be trapped inside
Her abuser wins,

 She would still live in fear
.© Mary G. 


16 comments:

Tamara said...

Mary,

I wish I could take away all of your pain so that you could look in the mirror and see only love for yourself. That is what both you and the little girl deserve. Lots and lots of love.

Hugs,
Tamara

Deb said...

The mirror will be your friend one day, and show you the reflection of the strong little girl and the grown woman who tends to her throughout it all.

Mary said...

Tamara, thank you for your comment, I hope one day I'll be able to do that..take care.Mary

Deb, I hope your right, thanks..Mary

Marie said...

Mary, once again bravo! I see in this poem refrences to the inner child. One thing survivors need to nuture in the healing process.

I too wrote about (its in the book) what I see when I look in the mirror. It's a coincidence that it is titled "The Mirror" as well. My version deals with the aftermath of my destructive ways.

One day Mary, this pain will be a distant memory and you will be whole.

Now in the healing process, I look in the mirror and see someone totally diffrent. One day you will to.

Marie
(((((((HUGS))))))

Patricia Singleton said...

Mary, I can so relate to your poem. I have been the one looking into that mirror and seeing only a broken child looking back and at others times, a hurting, disheartened woman. Today, I see a strong, caring woman who is capable of reaching out to others as well as who is capable of loving herself and others. Others, like you, are why I write my story on my blog. I am glad that you found my blog and like what you read. One of these days you will be able to look in that mirror for yourself and see the wonderful, loving, strong survivor that you are. Keep writing about what you feel. That is the best healing tool that I have ever found.

Benji said...

Hi Mary,

I've been looking in to see how you are. So sad to see that your thoughts, feelings and memories are still so relentlessly torment you.

I do have one observation to make about "The Mirror". The hate in the little girl's eyes is not directed at you. Please keep trying to reach out to her - she so needs warm loving arms and someone who believes in her. She needs you.

-Benji-Mebenji

Hopefulsl said...

That must be very hard on you knowing that you have no choice but to look in that mirror everyday to see how you look or just to get ready to go somewhere!!!! How awful this is for you......I will wish that someday you will be able to look at the real you, meaning now as a grown adult and know that you are a wonderful and loving person. Just take a look around you, and you can see all the beautiful people who share this life with you now. That is only because they do love you for who you are, now you need to do the same by telling yourself in the mirror.....I will pray for someday that you will be able to do that-AMEN......
Hugs & Hugs My Friend!
Love,Stacy

Tracy said...

The mirror is also a reflection of a beautiful woman who has had a lot in life to deal with. One who is courageous and empathy, one who has a beautiful heart and soul. This lady also you need to see. :) Because this is the lady that people has gotten to know on your blog. One day maybe you will be able to see her also. Hugs Mary. Know you are a wonderful lady!

Strong and determined said...

((((Mary))))

Thinking of you and wishing you well as you continue on your healing journey.

Dorothy said...

Mary, I've been catching up since my return to work full time, trying to stay more current on my blog and just accepting life, wondering with every pain the cancer is back.

So I read and I wept inside for you as many of us have so much pain that is not treatable. I pray for you this has been an awful month for me as well. My son Daniel was killed 17 years ago and it meant he was dead as long as he lived on this earth. I hate that..so blessed be you and blessed be me, as we endure what life has given us..

My prayers..

Dorothy from grammology
grammology.com

Jess said...

Mary...I feel so stupid dear. I had the lighter side link on my sidebar, and I kept wondering why you werent updating it! I had no clue you had this other blog... i would have been, and have been visiting you regularly. I'm so sorry that I didn't know this. Please forgive me and I will be back this time! I promise!!!

Mary said...

Jess its ok no problem, glad to see you. take care..Mary

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