The Blog Farm

The Blog Farm

Monday, November 9, 2009

To My Mother

I felt the loss of my childhood
In so many many ways,
I only saw your anger
Everyday it was displayed.

You were always so very busy
To see much need for me,
Away from you I was happy
I felt completely free.

And then there was the shame
Of two people touching me,
You weren't around to see it
To this you must agree!!

My shame should be yours also
You never protected me,
Or hugged me when I cried at night
It was him you sent to see.

The damage done was irreversible
I felt dirty by their touch,
Two people you did love and trust
It gave them such a rush.

You're as much to blame as they are
You never cared, you brushed me aside,
I wish I could have come to you
But I knew you'd say I lied.

I really really did love you
Even though you hurt me so,
You were the only mother I knew
But did YOU love me? I'll never know.

written by Mary Graziano


Dorothy said...

The pain of not knowing if someone you needed to love you and forgive for what they didn't or could do is forever. The only thing we can do when that happens is figure out a way to live with it. I'm so sorry for what you endure every day. I wish there was a window high up in the sky that we could throw all the bad out of.

My thoughts and my blessings for peace within your heart some day.

Dorothy from grammology

Mary said...

Thanks Dorothy, I wish I could throw them out too, remembering sucks.

Marj aka Thriver said...

Hey there! I saw a comment of yours over at Heal and Forgive and I realized you are blogging again. Hooray! This poem, as usual, really expresses the emotion of the unprotected child. Thanks for your courage in sharing. Could you share also at Thursday's BLOG CARNIVAL AGAINST CHILD ABUSE for the poetry section? I'm hosting it myself this month in honor of Thursday's World Day for the Prevention of Child Abuse. Thanks in advance!

And I'm so glad you're back! :)

Mary said...

Hi Marj, thanks and yes I will enter a poem

Patricia Singleton said...

What a powerful testimony to the power of abuse. Thank you for sharing it. Yes, mothers should protect their children. Shame on them when they don't even try.