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“OUR LITTLE GAME”
Sitting in the darkness
With so much sadness on her face,
Tears welling up inside her eyes
She's breathing as if in a race.
She listens for the footsteps
That she knows are going to come,
She hugs her knees together
And to herself begins to hum.
Her eyes she closes so tightly
As her heart it skips a beat,
No-one around to save her
Her abuser she is soon to meet.
Slowly her door did open
As his figure looms so big,
Tears start streaming down her face
As her fingers in her skin did dig.
She rolled herself into a ball
As he stood right next to her,
He bent down low and whispered
But she didn't even stir.
“I'm here for you, is what he said
Come, let's go and have some fun.”
'NO!!!” she yelled inside herself
But his booming words had stung.
She couldn't yell her words out-loud
He would smother her mouth with his hand,
So there was no use to fight him
She just couldn't understand.
He scooped her up into his arms
And kissed her upon her cheek,
She wanted to scream and claw at him
But her spirit was just too weak.
He threw her on the bed so rough
She tried to squirm away,
But he held her down and told her
“Don't you move, you have to stay.”
Her tears were like a fountain
Spewing down upon her face,
“Please don't do that to me,” she yelled
But he answered with such disgrace.
“You're mine to do with as I please”
Is what he said to her,
“But daddy,let me go, please stop!!!”
But he pressed down so she couldn't stir.
She lay so still as if in a trance
As he squirmed on top and sighed,
She couldn't bear to look at him
She wished she could have died.
As she lay there he whispered into her ear
“Remember this is our little game,”
She cringed when she did hear this
And thinks she is to blame.
She rocked herself to sleep that night
And wished for angels to come,
To set her free from this abuse
That has made her feel so numb.
But no-one came to set her free
Her stomach would twist into knots,
Not knowing what else was coming next
She wished and hopes he rots.
Now as an adult she faces the wrath
Of the demons that haunt her soul,
The memories are fresh, and take over her mind
Of the childhood and joy he stole.
Written by Mary G.
20 comments:
(((((Mary)))))
Thinking of you and sending big hugs.
Tamara
Just stopping by to say hello
Thanks Tamara....take care Mary
Jess Thanks for stopping by and saying hello..take care Mary
You always had a way with words and your poetry continues to be just as powerful as the first poem I read of yours years ago!!
((((Mary)))
Your poetry is heartbreaking.
Mary,
This is how I felt too when my abuser came into my room at night!
I went so far as to lock the door to my bedroom from the inside just so he would not come. That did not work for long.
This is beautifully written. Belive me when I tell you I do feel your pain.
Please keep writing, with each poem you will grow stronger!!!
D...Thanks for visiting my blog, that means a lot to me..hugsssss.
Anonyomous Drifter: Thanks for the comment
Marie: If I can reach out to someone and help them by writing my poetry it will make me happy to know I helped them, and hopefully it will make me stronger..thanks..take care..
Very powerful words you were able to get out. I hope the writing process helps you to calm the hurt that rages up inside. You are amazingly strong. I hope you know that.
Much peace and calmness to you Mary
Hi Jade thanks for the comment, it is helping, but still havent been able to get any anger out, but am working on it with my therapist...thanks..take care..
i think so many survivors can relate to this including us
Hi Jumpinginpuddles. I think you are right, and I hope it helps some survivors in some way. thanks for the comment..hugss
A very sad and moving poem, Mary. I am glad you express yourself this way and I'm sorry you were hurt like this.
Once again you have touched my heart in a sad way!!!!!I hope and pray that someday you can be released from all of that hurt you are holding in.....
Hugs & Blessings My Friend,
Love,Stacy
(((((MARY)))))
That picture does me in even before I read your powerful words.
What a heartwrenching poem! I have a blog for Domestic Violence. I've been writing this whole month about abuse.
Love your blog.
very very powerful! I was caught up and swept away by the cadence of the words, and of course the imagery called up by the simple yet powerful words.
(I saw two errors that kinda detracted form the experience though:
"She couldn't bare to look at him" shouldn't it be bear? unless you're punning, of course...
"She cringed when she did here this" I think you mean "hear"?
You are such a prolific poet, Mary! Your poems are so moving and powerful. I'm glad I have a "POETRY" category for the blog carnival. Finally able to include two of your poems in this edition.
I had an idea to start a "Survivors Poetry" blog carnival...but I can barely keep the child abuse carnival up and running. Oh well, maybe some day.
Your poems show the courage that you have in facing those demons of the past. Sending you hugs and love for healing.
absolutely beautiful...i am going to link to this on my blog...thank you so much for your words and courage...
Horrifying portrayal in a poem that can't help but bring sorrow to ones heart, the fact that this is truth is even more deeply saddening.
I see that you find comfort in poetry, continue flourishing that outlet.
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